9th Anniversary

Today is the 9th anniversary of the stillbirth of our third child Dawn. We named her Dawn after my older sister who also is not with us. I am glad that I was able to know the cause of she death and that I was able to hold her in my arms and have the proper closure to not having her with our on this earth. It does still hurt to think about at times and Yes I am crying as I type this. It is a hurt that will never leave. In time it is easier to handle, but I do have my moments and not just around the day of her birth. I will feel a pain of guilty that I am here and she is not. I do miss her and I do wish at times that she was here. I try to picture what she would look like and what personality she would have. Those thoughts are the most strong at this time. I do know that her hair would have been a medium shade of brown like Liz and I. No matter what she is loved and missed deeply. To all the mommy's-to-be, cherish the the moment before the birth of your child. Write down the changes your body goes through, the changes in the growth of your baby, and the first times during the months of your pregnancy. It may sound funny, but it is the best thing for you and that child to cherish for always. Pregnancy is a scary thing and the most exciting thing, but the end result is the most memorable thing you will ever have. So if it is your first or 18th baby, each pregnancy is wonderful.
Congratulations to all the new mommys-to-be. I love all of you and happy that you are adding to your families.